The Big Lebowski – Review

It’s no secret that this is one of my all time favourite films, every video store clerk has one (that they also enjoy slipping quotes from into every day conversation). It’s my go to film to recommend to people that fit the bill (by that I mean, people that act like The Dude).

In every great directors career there is a film where all the stars align. The script is perfect, the acting is impeccable and the movie seems to just magically fall into place. The Coen brothers could have not since put together a more well balanced and enjoyable film.

Years later audiences are still enjoy the story of “The Dude” (Jeff Bridges) and his laid back approach to life, not to mention his love of bowling with his eclectic mix of friends – Walter (John Goodman) and Donny (Steve Buscemi). This is a tale of intrigue (and rugs) that follows The Dude after a case of mistaken identity gets him mixed up in kidnapping. 

Stellar performances by the whole cast, including a legendary performance by John Turturro as The Dudes bowling rival and pederast “The Jesus”.

A must watch piece of cinematic genius 10/10⭐️

Just remember – If you want a toe, I can get you a toe… Just after I find my marmot.

Kids – Review

Early to mid nineties youth counterculture was was fuelled by sex drugs and alcohol. Taking a cue from the grunge era, it was alright to be a bit of a slacker, it was routine for us Kids to just hang out and get wasted.
This is the story of a day of the life of Telly and Casper. Kids who have left there morals at home (and their belts too, apparently) and were out to get high and get laid. What they don’t know is that their actions are going to have far reaching consequences for themselves and the others they come into contact with. If you are in a fragile disposition, this film is not for you. These Kids portray sex, drugs, violence and rape as a part of their daily lives, and at the end of the film you wouldn’t be surprised if they just got up and started all over again without a second thought. 

This is one of my all time favourite films, I think that this is one of those films that people need to see alongside the likes of Requiem for a Dream ( that would be a very harsh double bill indeed ) this deserves 10/10 ⭐️ a modern classic in my opinion. It will always have a place on my recommendation shelf.

I’m gonna go dust off my skateboard and drink a 20…

Deadpool – Review

Some comic book movie fans are of the opinion that this their favourite Marvel film so far. Well I’m not afraid to say, their opinion is wrong.
Here is some good old fashioned video store clerk advise…The film is not a bad one, it’s not great, it’ just doesn’t stink (you will see how bad it doesn’t stink later in the review). The action and CGI take this film beyond the average and mundane, in fact the visuals are fucking amazing ( yes, I swore, get over it, I am desensitised by the end of the film, someone needs to throw in a Captain America “language” line somewhere). The plot was a bit weak, a large portion relies upon a flashback to tell a mini origin story, while helpful to the viewer, this is a mark of lazy storytelling and is a crutch to move the plot forward. The other thing that the fans are raving about is the breaking of the fourth wall, let me tell you something video store patrons, it’s not a new thing nor will it be the last film to do it. It’s just been done better, Malcolm in the middle, for example did it a little smoother and with more finesse than the stunted , “Oh, hello” to the viewers, with a Ryan Reynolds surprised face under the mask.

The things that it lacked was a sidekick and a slightly larger cast (even though the best thing in it was Megasonic Teenage Warhead), also for a Marvel movie the story lacked depth and complexity, which we have come to expect from them. To me this seemed to be a shit X-men movie rather than a film that will tie into the MCU (Marvel Cinematic Universe muggles. Keep up!) I don’t think Deadpool as a character would work alongside Antman or the latest version of Spiderman or Ironman. Too many smart mouth quips could turn a movie into an annoying character showcase instead of being an awesome superhero story arch.

Like I said it’s not a terrible film and I found myself being entertained, so 8/10⭐️. Put it this way, it smells better that two hobos fucking, in a shoe filled with piss.

Elite Squad – Review

A member of the Brazilian elite police unit (BOPE) is planning on retiring from this dangerous, but necessary occupation, to lead a more sedate family life. Before he can do this he must find a worthy replacement.This film could have easily followed an action packed Hollywood formula, but instead it starts out slowly and allows for more character development (not necessarily a bad thing, but does jolt the pace of the film a little).

The film does however deliver on its promise later on with a training montage (that could have been a little longer) and some action that we expect from these types of films.

Overall a decent solid film 7/10⭐️

I hope when I get to Rio I can sleep through the gunfire, I’m gonna have to ask the pope just how he does it.

The Revenant – Review

It’s a brutal watch, with a few look away moments. The now infamous scene of the bear attack was uncomfortable to say the least, even more so than the rape and killings that are sporadically dotted about in this film. It was wonderfully shot with some breathtaking scenery, amazing job by the DP (that’s short for Director of Photography for you muggles out there).

 Other than the compelling visuals it was had a very basic storyline, the Film title gives away most of the plot (go and look up what Revenant means, come back and finish reading my review).

Grunting aside, the dialogue was simple. But to be fair, at that time in American history I suppose the wasn’t a whole lot of “fancy tawkin”. It did however in some bits border on pulling lines directly from Yosemite Sam in the Looney Tunes cartoons ( I was really hoping for someone to throw in a “Varment” or “critters” somewhere, but alas no).

The director, Alejandro G Iñárritu, puts together an entertaining film about one mans sheer willpower to live against all odds (which DiCaprio delivers in a very strong performance. Even making it believable he could speak a native North American dialect.)

I would recommend this as a something to watch if you are feeling lazy and don’t need an over complicated film to watch.

I give this 8/10⭐️

*No bears were harmed in the writing of this review (I could kill a bear, really, if I wanted to. I just don’t feel like it right now.)